i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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