that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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