I'm lost and stupid without you.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
