This girl is more easily done than said...
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Randomize
