I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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