Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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