You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I enjoy the company of your penis
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
