found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
