the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
