Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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