If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I have aggressive nipples.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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