its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
