also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
