Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
