Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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