do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
