Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
