did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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