People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize