the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
