lets start a swedish sibling band together
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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