I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
