ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
