But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
