the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
