i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
vagina is talking i cant
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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