I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
