He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
