So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
