So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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