I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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