that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
