If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
