Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
he puts the penis in happiness.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Damn victory sex feels great
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
