Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
