If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
