Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
