please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Randomize
