Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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