im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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