i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Randomize
