ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
