Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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