I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
