my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
