i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
