its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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