Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
