I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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