its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I wish there were birth control emojis
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
