We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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